10 Items Or Less

I didn't realize the post about my mother and grandmother would strike a chord with so many of you, so try this one on for size.

Shopping with my mother has always been an experience. In fact, if shopping was an Olympic event, my mother would win a Gold Medal. She's got speed. She's got endurance. She's got the ability to sift through crap and find a deal faster than you can say ANBESOL.

I on the other hand, wouldn't even place in the top 10. I can find a deal and I can move fast, but I'm a "get in and get out" kinda girl. I don't really like shopping. I know as I'm writing this a hush has fallen over the male portion of the readers of this blog. It's sad but true, not all women were born with a platinum credit card hanging from their mouth.

Still although I can totally give or take the act of shopping, that doesn't mean I don't like getting nice things or spending quality time with my mom via her passion. But what I really dread is checkout time.

I hate the checkout process for one reason. My mother insists on adding up her purchases in her head or with a calculator ahead of time. Now this, to me makes sense. She's trying to make sure she knows how much it is all going to total so she's ready to pay and so she's also ready to call the manager if an item rings up as more, never less.

But once she has done the total in her head and it's for a certain amount, the checkbook comes out. Right then and there, whether we're by the turtlenecks or the Toasted Oats, mom has to start writing out her check. Meanwhile, the already long lines are getting longer and longer.

Now my thing is this: I have no problem with her getting started on something like that ahead of time. It's a time saver. It shows initative. But when you insist on standing nowhere near the line before doing it? Now that's just plain silly. If there wasn't a line I'd understand, but when there's a line, that gives you something to do so it seems the logical choice.

But don't you dare try to move mom closer to the line when she's doing this. I've tried this and she gets all flustered as if suddenly the lines will part and she will be right up front with nothing to show for it.

I've tried to explain to her on many occassions just how absurd this habit is, but it's no use. I guess the moral of the story is you can lead mom to the grocery store, but you can't make her wait in line.