Voices Carry
One day, years from now, the children of tomorrow will ask about what movies were like in "the old days".
They might have heard things like how Moses and Apple's mom used to be something called an actress, or how Katie Holmes and Tom Cruise used to also do this mysterious thing known as acting, instead of leading a cult.
If I'm lucky enough to be one of the people to pass on my infinite wisdom, I will tell it like it was.
Yes, I will tell the children that once upon a time, (or as my students like to write, once a pond a time), movies used to actually star people like you and I. These people were called actors and actresses. Actors and actresses were also people who eventually got their own television shows where they acted out their real lives, pretending it was real. This might sound confusing to you now, but given that everyone will also have their own reality show in the future, they'll be able to comprehend this just fine.
I will also tell the children that not every movie was a cartoon and/or digitally enhanced. Now this, this will truly amaze them. See in their world, they will know nothing of the movies you and I grew up with that starred famous faces like Eddie Murphy or Julia Roberts. No, their intimate knowledge of famous people will be via their voices they provide to cartoons and digitally animated films.
Think about it. We're already halfway there. Half of the movies that come out have big stars attached to them, but not any big stars actually IN them.
In fact, voiceover actors used to be a breed all their own. The reason they are voiceover actors and not movie stars is because they usually have what I like to call, "a face for radio". Through the magic of cartoons and commercials, these actors had a fighting chance. Now, with these plum roles being stolen, the words are being taken right out of their mouths, literally.
In some ways I guess it makes some sort of sense. I mean telecommuting to work is becoming more and more popular in many fields, why not in movies, too? Plus, Robin Williams ain't getting any younger. Now he no longer needs to jump around like a hyena, he actually has a hyena do it for him. He can sit back in his pjs or, better yet, wear nothing at all. Sorry for the unfortunate imagery.
Yes, Hollywood is proving that anything you can act, they can draw better. Facial expressions are apparently, overrated. Even the Geico gecko has something to say now. I think that's the voice of Related actor, Callum Blue. If it is indeed Callum, he's raking in the dough, but his face, many of you, will never know.
It should go without saying that Samuel L. Jackson is the exception to the rule since, in the future, that man still will star in everything. Think of him as the "i before e, except after c" of Hollywood.
That's of course, if I have anything to say about it.
They might have heard things like how Moses and Apple's mom used to be something called an actress, or how Katie Holmes and Tom Cruise used to also do this mysterious thing known as acting, instead of leading a cult.
If I'm lucky enough to be one of the people to pass on my infinite wisdom, I will tell it like it was.
Yes, I will tell the children that once upon a time, (or as my students like to write, once a pond a time), movies used to actually star people like you and I. These people were called actors and actresses. Actors and actresses were also people who eventually got their own television shows where they acted out their real lives, pretending it was real. This might sound confusing to you now, but given that everyone will also have their own reality show in the future, they'll be able to comprehend this just fine.
I will also tell the children that not every movie was a cartoon and/or digitally enhanced. Now this, this will truly amaze them. See in their world, they will know nothing of the movies you and I grew up with that starred famous faces like Eddie Murphy or Julia Roberts. No, their intimate knowledge of famous people will be via their voices they provide to cartoons and digitally animated films.
Think about it. We're already halfway there. Half of the movies that come out have big stars attached to them, but not any big stars actually IN them.
In fact, voiceover actors used to be a breed all their own. The reason they are voiceover actors and not movie stars is because they usually have what I like to call, "a face for radio". Through the magic of cartoons and commercials, these actors had a fighting chance. Now, with these plum roles being stolen, the words are being taken right out of their mouths, literally.
In some ways I guess it makes some sort of sense. I mean telecommuting to work is becoming more and more popular in many fields, why not in movies, too? Plus, Robin Williams ain't getting any younger. Now he no longer needs to jump around like a hyena, he actually has a hyena do it for him. He can sit back in his pjs or, better yet, wear nothing at all. Sorry for the unfortunate imagery.
Yes, Hollywood is proving that anything you can act, they can draw better. Facial expressions are apparently, overrated. Even the Geico gecko has something to say now. I think that's the voice of Related actor, Callum Blue. If it is indeed Callum, he's raking in the dough, but his face, many of you, will never know.
It should go without saying that Samuel L. Jackson is the exception to the rule since, in the future, that man still will star in everything. Think of him as the "i before e, except after c" of Hollywood.
That's of course, if I have anything to say about it.
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