Eight Great Things About I Love The 80's 3D: 1986 & 1987
1986
1. ON EIGHTIES BULLY WILLIAM ZABKA IN MOVIES LIKE BACK TO SCHOOL "How terrible would it be to show up on your first day of college and say, 'Oh Zabka! The next four years are gonna suck!" (Modern Humorist )
"You just wonder if he still sees movies with jerks and he's like, I could have been that jerk, and now you're using some other actor? It doesn't seem fair."(Brian Posehn)
2. "Obviously the show was much better when they didn't get along." (Greg Fitzsimmons on Love Connection)
3. ON JERMAINE "WE DON'T HAVE TO TAKE OUR CLOTHES OFF" STEWART "Jermaine Stewart was like a girl with a mustache. I was like you don't have to take a damn thing off cause I don't know what you are." (Godfrey)
"I think he was right. You don't have to take your clothes off to have a good time. You can go to a birthday party. You don't have to take your clothes off to whack a pinata." (Mo Rocca)
4. "People who loved old people and murder watched Murder She Wrote....he (the sheriff) couldn't solve anything but she (Jessica) could because she was an author. JD Salinger has, you know, hundreds of murder crimes in his career...Cabot Cove Maine was a delightful little town, but the murder rate per capita had to have been high. I think there was only 40 people in that town and then when the show was over there was like Jessica Fletcher and the sheriff." (Bil Dwyer)
5. ON HEART'S WILSON SISTERS "Every single shot of Nancy was the full length, head to toe, rocking out shot and every shot of Ann was like this. It was like Nancy Wilson and her sister, the disembodied head."
"She's behind the candlebra all of a sudden. Behind moving boxes. In this video we're gonna be moving and uh, you're just behind the moving boxes honey." (Michael Ian Black)
6. "The Color of Money is a classic mentoring tale. Paul Newman teaches Tom Cruise how to be a scam artist. It makes you wonder about Paul Newman. I mean is the whole salad dressing for charity thing just a scam, too?" (Mo Rocca)
7. "Wasn't Steve Guttenberg in like, every other movie released in the eighties? He was like the eighties Jude Law." (Weird Al Yankovic)
8. "Head of the Class featured a gorgeous mosaic of losers. I mean losers of all different races and backgrounds." (Mo Rocca)
1987
1. "I know I'm all powerful, and I could probably get it from any other place in the world, but you gotta get the eight million or I pop a cap in your ass." (Rachael Harris on the Oral Roberts controversy)
2. "Max Headroom was like a digital Jim Carrey. He was always going Ahh!" (Modern Humorist)
3. ON BABY JESSICA "Baby Jessica was only 18 months old. Apparently her family was very thirsty because they sent this child to go get some water." (Mo Rocca)
"Baby Jessica fell down the well and people didn't realize, so they're making wishes and they're just peppering her with pennies and people are like, 'How come my wish isn't coming true? All I hear is some kid screaming.'" (Bil Dwyer)
"Wondering if she would make it. Wondering if she would survive and wondering why somebody had a well on their property in 1987!" (Chris Jericho)
4. "Oh I love microwave ovens! They cook things awful fast. Say you've got to bake a potato. In the old days nine weeks, minimum. Microwave? Done." (Michael Ian Black)
5. "I don't think Spencer was the first detective you would have picked. You would have worked your way through Kojak and Beretta and then said, 'Well, Spencer's for hire." (Hal Sparks)
6. "This is horrible! Now all I have is 87 million dollars!" (Gilbert Gottfried on the stock markets Black Monday)
7. "I think it's like we're slow dancing at my cousin's Bar Mitzvah and she says, 'Honey, I'm sorry, we're through.'/'You're dumping me for Moysha? That's how I interpreted that song. That the girl's dumping him form Moysha, the Hasidic guy. Is that right?" (Michael Ian Black's interpretation of Cutting Crew's song, "I Just Died In Your Arms Tonight")
8. "I always say wait for the compliment. Let the compliment come to you. Why are you wearing a sandwich board that says I'm beautiful? Relax sister!" (Nicole Sullivan on the "Don't Hate Me Cause I'm Beautiful" Pantene commercials)
1. ON EIGHTIES BULLY WILLIAM ZABKA IN MOVIES LIKE BACK TO SCHOOL "How terrible would it be to show up on your first day of college and say, 'Oh Zabka! The next four years are gonna suck!" (Modern Humorist )
"You just wonder if he still sees movies with jerks and he's like, I could have been that jerk, and now you're using some other actor? It doesn't seem fair."(Brian Posehn)
2. "Obviously the show was much better when they didn't get along." (Greg Fitzsimmons on Love Connection)
3. ON JERMAINE "WE DON'T HAVE TO TAKE OUR CLOTHES OFF" STEWART "Jermaine Stewart was like a girl with a mustache. I was like you don't have to take a damn thing off cause I don't know what you are." (Godfrey)
"I think he was right. You don't have to take your clothes off to have a good time. You can go to a birthday party. You don't have to take your clothes off to whack a pinata." (Mo Rocca)
4. "People who loved old people and murder watched Murder She Wrote....he (the sheriff) couldn't solve anything but she (Jessica) could because she was an author. JD Salinger has, you know, hundreds of murder crimes in his career...Cabot Cove Maine was a delightful little town, but the murder rate per capita had to have been high. I think there was only 40 people in that town and then when the show was over there was like Jessica Fletcher and the sheriff." (Bil Dwyer)
5. ON HEART'S WILSON SISTERS "Every single shot of Nancy was the full length, head to toe, rocking out shot and every shot of Ann was like this. It was like Nancy Wilson and her sister, the disembodied head."
"She's behind the candlebra all of a sudden. Behind moving boxes. In this video we're gonna be moving and uh, you're just behind the moving boxes honey." (Michael Ian Black)
6. "The Color of Money is a classic mentoring tale. Paul Newman teaches Tom Cruise how to be a scam artist. It makes you wonder about Paul Newman. I mean is the whole salad dressing for charity thing just a scam, too?" (Mo Rocca)
7. "Wasn't Steve Guttenberg in like, every other movie released in the eighties? He was like the eighties Jude Law." (Weird Al Yankovic)
8. "Head of the Class featured a gorgeous mosaic of losers. I mean losers of all different races and backgrounds." (Mo Rocca)
1987
1. "I know I'm all powerful, and I could probably get it from any other place in the world, but you gotta get the eight million or I pop a cap in your ass." (Rachael Harris on the Oral Roberts controversy)
2. "Max Headroom was like a digital Jim Carrey. He was always going Ahh!" (Modern Humorist)
3. ON BABY JESSICA "Baby Jessica was only 18 months old. Apparently her family was very thirsty because they sent this child to go get some water." (Mo Rocca)
"Baby Jessica fell down the well and people didn't realize, so they're making wishes and they're just peppering her with pennies and people are like, 'How come my wish isn't coming true? All I hear is some kid screaming.'" (Bil Dwyer)
"Wondering if she would make it. Wondering if she would survive and wondering why somebody had a well on their property in 1987!" (Chris Jericho)
4. "Oh I love microwave ovens! They cook things awful fast. Say you've got to bake a potato. In the old days nine weeks, minimum. Microwave? Done." (Michael Ian Black)
5. "I don't think Spencer was the first detective you would have picked. You would have worked your way through Kojak and Beretta and then said, 'Well, Spencer's for hire." (Hal Sparks)
6. "This is horrible! Now all I have is 87 million dollars!" (Gilbert Gottfried on the stock markets Black Monday)
7. "I think it's like we're slow dancing at my cousin's Bar Mitzvah and she says, 'Honey, I'm sorry, we're through.'/'You're dumping me for Moysha? That's how I interpreted that song. That the girl's dumping him form Moysha, the Hasidic guy. Is that right?" (Michael Ian Black's interpretation of Cutting Crew's song, "I Just Died In Your Arms Tonight")
8. "I always say wait for the compliment. Let the compliment come to you. Why are you wearing a sandwich board that says I'm beautiful? Relax sister!" (Nicole Sullivan on the "Don't Hate Me Cause I'm Beautiful" Pantene commercials)
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