9 Great Things About I Love The 90's...1996 & 1997: Part Deux
1996
1. "That's a true Olympian there, man. Just f*** your ankle up for life. But you got a medal!" (Rachael Harris on Keri Strug's Olympic victory)
2. "Is that the one that they called Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet? That was a pathetic commentary on the ignorance of society if they had to call it Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet. What's it gonna be- DJ Jazzy Jeff's Romeo and Juliet?" (Ben Stein)
3. "It's amazing how insulting the you might be a redneck routine is and how much rednecks actually like it. If you're too stupid to know you're being made fun of? You might be a redneck." (Hal Sparks on Jeff Foxworthy's redneck routine)
4. "Who killed Tupac? Ryan Seacrest. I think everybody knows that." (Greg Fitzsimmons)
5. "Except for morbid obesity, the baldness, the walrus look and the dependency on opiates, a lady could do a lot worse. Because he could harmonize." (Michael Ian Black on David Crosby fathering Melissa Etheridge's baby)
6. "Ahh, that was a beautiful song. Now R. Kelly is singing I believe I can lie." (Loni Love)
7. "Ted Kaczynski disproving the notion that Polish people can't come up with a recipe for anything." (Bil Dwyer on the unabomber)
8. "Every once and awhile jig fever sweeps America and it came back in '96 with avengance!" (Michael Ian Black on Riverdance)
9. "The Caesar (haircut) was like the Rachel for men." (Modern Humorist)
1997
1. "What? Is he auditioning to be the new dial tone?" (Hal Sparks on Kenny G's 45 minute solo holding note)
2. "He invented the record. That's genius. I don't hold any records. I have The Knack on vinyl. That's the only record I own." (Michael Ian Black on Kenny G's record)
3. "He is survived by his longterm companion, The Marlboro Man and their adopted daughter, Courtney Love." (Mo Rocca on Joe Camel's retirement)
4. "TV MA- I still don't know what that means. I think it stands for TV Massachusetts. TV: TV- I think it stands for TV transvestite. TV 14- let's you know if you're under 14, this is probably a show you want to watch." (Michael Ian Black on the TV rating system)
5. "I was on the end of my seat that whole movie saying, what's gonna happen? What's gonna happen at the end?!" (Michael Ian Black on Titanic)
6. "Well, look. I've always loved Celine. As you know, I always wear her fragrance. So for me, she can do no wrong." (Michael Ian Black on Celine Dion's My Heart Will Go On)
7. "Rule is I think in Hollywood is right after you win an Oscar, you're supposed to do a bunch of crappy action movies." (Brad Sherwood on Nicholas Cage's choosing Con Air)
8. "Marcy's Playground smelling like both sex and candy. I'm trying to think. I guess certain candies do smell like sex." (Michael Ian Black on Marcy Playground's song, Sex and Candy)
9. "Starstrip Troopers may be the most underrated film of the century. It was a sort of dark, social commentary that people didn't really understand. And when I say people, I'm raising my own hand." (Michael Ian Black)..."I think actually some of the insects were slightly less rigid than Casper Van Dien" (Chris Hardwick)
1. "That's a true Olympian there, man. Just f*** your ankle up for life. But you got a medal!" (Rachael Harris on Keri Strug's Olympic victory)
2. "Is that the one that they called Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet? That was a pathetic commentary on the ignorance of society if they had to call it Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet. What's it gonna be- DJ Jazzy Jeff's Romeo and Juliet?" (Ben Stein)
3. "It's amazing how insulting the you might be a redneck routine is and how much rednecks actually like it. If you're too stupid to know you're being made fun of? You might be a redneck." (Hal Sparks on Jeff Foxworthy's redneck routine)
4. "Who killed Tupac? Ryan Seacrest. I think everybody knows that." (Greg Fitzsimmons)
5. "Except for morbid obesity, the baldness, the walrus look and the dependency on opiates, a lady could do a lot worse. Because he could harmonize." (Michael Ian Black on David Crosby fathering Melissa Etheridge's baby)
6. "Ahh, that was a beautiful song. Now R. Kelly is singing I believe I can lie." (Loni Love)
7. "Ted Kaczynski disproving the notion that Polish people can't come up with a recipe for anything." (Bil Dwyer on the unabomber)
8. "Every once and awhile jig fever sweeps America and it came back in '96 with avengance!" (Michael Ian Black on Riverdance)
9. "The Caesar (haircut) was like the Rachel for men." (Modern Humorist)
1997
1. "What? Is he auditioning to be the new dial tone?" (Hal Sparks on Kenny G's 45 minute solo holding note)
2. "He invented the record. That's genius. I don't hold any records. I have The Knack on vinyl. That's the only record I own." (Michael Ian Black on Kenny G's record)
3. "He is survived by his longterm companion, The Marlboro Man and their adopted daughter, Courtney Love." (Mo Rocca on Joe Camel's retirement)
4. "TV MA- I still don't know what that means. I think it stands for TV Massachusetts. TV: TV- I think it stands for TV transvestite. TV 14- let's you know if you're under 14, this is probably a show you want to watch." (Michael Ian Black on the TV rating system)
5. "I was on the end of my seat that whole movie saying, what's gonna happen? What's gonna happen at the end?!" (Michael Ian Black on Titanic)
6. "Well, look. I've always loved Celine. As you know, I always wear her fragrance. So for me, she can do no wrong." (Michael Ian Black on Celine Dion's My Heart Will Go On)
7. "Rule is I think in Hollywood is right after you win an Oscar, you're supposed to do a bunch of crappy action movies." (Brad Sherwood on Nicholas Cage's choosing Con Air)
8. "Marcy's Playground smelling like both sex and candy. I'm trying to think. I guess certain candies do smell like sex." (Michael Ian Black on Marcy Playground's song, Sex and Candy)
9. "Starstrip Troopers may be the most underrated film of the century. It was a sort of dark, social commentary that people didn't really understand. And when I say people, I'm raising my own hand." (Michael Ian Black)..."I think actually some of the insects were slightly less rigid than Casper Van Dien" (Chris Hardwick)
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