Here Comes The Man Known As Black
In the past I have eluded to brief conversations I had with the man, the myth, the legend,Michael Ian Black. Last week I was looking for something on my computer when I found the transcript of our original correspondence. Imagine my pleasant surprise considering I didn't even remember saving it. I figured some of you might get a kick out of reading it as a twist on me just talking about him incessantly, like I often tend to do. So without further adieu, I present to you A Conversation With Michael Ian Black...
Date: July 14, 2003 3:23 PM
Subject: hey...don't I know you?
Message: I was sifting through this apparent bottomless pit of "friends in waiting" when I came across a face I recognized, though technically, did not
know.
That person was you.
I thought about how not to be cliche and state the obvious (love your work, yadda yadda) but then I thought to hell with it.
If you feel like venturing outside the safe haven otherwise known as your personal network, drop me a line.
Janet:)
Date: July 15, 2003 4:35 AM
Subject: Re: hey...don't I know you?
Message: Hi Janet,
It is with extreme trepidation that I step outside the safe haven that is my personal network to respond to your letter. (I'm kidding) What's the point of joining Friendster if you only talk to the same people you talk to all the time? None, that's what.
Thanks for the kind words.
I noticed you're a writer. What kind of writing do you do?
Also, you said that most people disappoint you. This is a very dismal outlook you maintain, Janet. Perhaps the problem is that your expectations are too high. If you just expect to meet miscreants and jerk-offs, you mostly will, and you won't be disappointed. Then, when somebody you like comes along, you'll be all the more thrilled. People almost never disappoint me, since I'm just a jerk-off myself, I can easily relate to them.
Feel free to write whenever,
Michael
Date: July 15, 2003 3:06 PM
Subject: Re: hey...don't I know you?
Message: Hey Michael,
I'm glad you wrote back. So far you are the only one who has responded to my cry for new friends, so I'm guessing our whole attitude towards meeting new people puts us in the minority...jk
A lot of meaning gets lost in email and messaging because you can't always tell how a person is saying something, especially if you don't know how they talk to begin with.
So you know ahead of time, I tend to be fairly sarcastic. Some people get it, some just get offended. In fact, the fact that sarcasm even has to be explained frustrates me, but I'm putting it out there anyway.
I will never mention it again.
Yes I am a writer, but as a great underrated musician, Jude Cole, once said, "I call myself a writer, but I never get paid." When I do write, I dabble mostly in pop culture pieces such as music and movie reviews. I toyed with the idea of being a music journalist for awhile, but didn't have the cutthroat personality to go along with it. So, with that in mind, I went back to school for another degree in Education. It's a good trade off though because this way, I get the best of both worlds since I can still write AND teach. But enough about me. What do you do with your days, if you don't mind me asking? I've always been rather curious what an actor etc. does when they are not working on something.
As for people disappointing me, I'm afraid this was only a partial jest. There is a lot of truth in humor after all. What can I say? I meet some crappy people.
Janet:)
Date: July 16, 2003 5:14 AM
Subject: Re: hey...don't I know you?
Message:
Janet,
To answer your question, actors do lots of stuff in their free time. In fact, one of the reason to become an actor is to have lots of free time because most of us are unemployed.
As for me, my free time is spent trying to figure out what the hell I'm going to do with myself when my current job goes away. You'd be surprised how much time you can fill obsessing about things you cannot control. Or maybe you wouldn't be surprised. Probably a lot of people do that.
Michael
Date: July 17, 2003 1:59 PM
Subject: passing time
Message: Michael,
I agree that it seems a major perk of being an actor must be the free time you get. I took an acting course in college, but never had the guts to go into it professionally. Instead I just watch a lot of tv. I'm kinda like an actress by
association. I really know way too much about people I don't really know. But don't worry. I don't mean in a stalker type way.
I also think it's pretty common to obsess. Or at least it is in my world. I always worry what my next move will be. Right now I'd just be happy to have it be out of my parents house.
I see you once lived in NJ. How long were you here and were you thrilled to get out?
Janet
Date: July 21, 2003 7:24 AM
Subject: Re: passing time
Message: Hi,
Sorry it took me a few days to write back. To answer your question, I grew up in Hillsborough, NJ, which is not a terrible place, but was definitely not for me. I was pretty thrilled to get out, but that would have been true for me no matter where I grew up - I just wanted to get out of the house, a problem I see you're still facing.
Michael
I realize the conversation drops off abruptly here. Most likely he stopped writing, though I can't recall the details. I assume there's only so long you can amuse the masses (i.e. me) though.
Some of you might wonder if I contacted him once and he was cool, why not contact him again? Well, recently, I did search for MIB on Friendster. While his profile is still up there, he hasn't logged on since December of 2003. Also, Friendster is much more a corporate conglomerate than it used to be, so I don't even say a way to email him like there used to be. I'm afraid I just don't know the secret password.
So this is where the story ends, at least for now. But the posts about MIB? Man, they'll never die.
Date: July 14, 2003 3:23 PM
Subject: hey...don't I know you?
Message: I was sifting through this apparent bottomless pit of "friends in waiting" when I came across a face I recognized, though technically, did not
know.
That person was you.
I thought about how not to be cliche and state the obvious (love your work, yadda yadda) but then I thought to hell with it.
If you feel like venturing outside the safe haven otherwise known as your personal network, drop me a line.
Janet:)
Date: July 15, 2003 4:35 AM
Subject: Re: hey...don't I know you?
Message: Hi Janet,
It is with extreme trepidation that I step outside the safe haven that is my personal network to respond to your letter. (I'm kidding) What's the point of joining Friendster if you only talk to the same people you talk to all the time? None, that's what.
Thanks for the kind words.
I noticed you're a writer. What kind of writing do you do?
Also, you said that most people disappoint you. This is a very dismal outlook you maintain, Janet. Perhaps the problem is that your expectations are too high. If you just expect to meet miscreants and jerk-offs, you mostly will, and you won't be disappointed. Then, when somebody you like comes along, you'll be all the more thrilled. People almost never disappoint me, since I'm just a jerk-off myself, I can easily relate to them.
Feel free to write whenever,
Michael
Date: July 15, 2003 3:06 PM
Subject: Re: hey...don't I know you?
Message: Hey Michael,
I'm glad you wrote back. So far you are the only one who has responded to my cry for new friends, so I'm guessing our whole attitude towards meeting new people puts us in the minority...jk
A lot of meaning gets lost in email and messaging because you can't always tell how a person is saying something, especially if you don't know how they talk to begin with.
So you know ahead of time, I tend to be fairly sarcastic. Some people get it, some just get offended. In fact, the fact that sarcasm even has to be explained frustrates me, but I'm putting it out there anyway.
I will never mention it again.
Yes I am a writer, but as a great underrated musician, Jude Cole, once said, "I call myself a writer, but I never get paid." When I do write, I dabble mostly in pop culture pieces such as music and movie reviews. I toyed with the idea of being a music journalist for awhile, but didn't have the cutthroat personality to go along with it. So, with that in mind, I went back to school for another degree in Education. It's a good trade off though because this way, I get the best of both worlds since I can still write AND teach. But enough about me. What do you do with your days, if you don't mind me asking? I've always been rather curious what an actor etc. does when they are not working on something.
As for people disappointing me, I'm afraid this was only a partial jest. There is a lot of truth in humor after all. What can I say? I meet some crappy people.
Janet:)
Date: July 16, 2003 5:14 AM
Subject: Re: hey...don't I know you?
Message:
Janet,
To answer your question, actors do lots of stuff in their free time. In fact, one of the reason to become an actor is to have lots of free time because most of us are unemployed.
As for me, my free time is spent trying to figure out what the hell I'm going to do with myself when my current job goes away. You'd be surprised how much time you can fill obsessing about things you cannot control. Or maybe you wouldn't be surprised. Probably a lot of people do that.
Michael
Date: July 17, 2003 1:59 PM
Subject: passing time
Message: Michael,
I agree that it seems a major perk of being an actor must be the free time you get. I took an acting course in college, but never had the guts to go into it professionally. Instead I just watch a lot of tv. I'm kinda like an actress by
association. I really know way too much about people I don't really know. But don't worry. I don't mean in a stalker type way.
I also think it's pretty common to obsess. Or at least it is in my world. I always worry what my next move will be. Right now I'd just be happy to have it be out of my parents house.
I see you once lived in NJ. How long were you here and were you thrilled to get out?
Janet
Date: July 21, 2003 7:24 AM
Subject: Re: passing time
Message: Hi,
Sorry it took me a few days to write back. To answer your question, I grew up in Hillsborough, NJ, which is not a terrible place, but was definitely not for me. I was pretty thrilled to get out, but that would have been true for me no matter where I grew up - I just wanted to get out of the house, a problem I see you're still facing.
Michael
I realize the conversation drops off abruptly here. Most likely he stopped writing, though I can't recall the details. I assume there's only so long you can amuse the masses (i.e. me) though.
Some of you might wonder if I contacted him once and he was cool, why not contact him again? Well, recently, I did search for MIB on Friendster. While his profile is still up there, he hasn't logged on since December of 2003. Also, Friendster is much more a corporate conglomerate than it used to be, so I don't even say a way to email him like there used to be. I'm afraid I just don't know the secret password.
So this is where the story ends, at least for now. But the posts about MIB? Man, they'll never die.
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