Ice, Ice Baby
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My whole life, sports and I have been like oil and water; we simply don't mix.
I throw like a girl. I have no strength. I'm not super competitive. Do I really need to keep going?
So it's not surprise that the feelings for the sports I play, carry over to the sports that I watch. In fact, I have only watched one sport with regularity. That sport, dear Internets, is ice skating.
I've heard the words of the naysayers before and frankly, they can be cold as ice. No, not all ice skaters are gay and yes, ice skating IS a real sport. Just because they get to wear pretty costumes and dance to fun music does not mean it's any easier than tackling or hitting a homerun. In fact, I'm going to go out on a limb here and say ice skating can skate circles around those other sports any day.
My love affair with the ice first came about when I discovered the man who will no doubt go do down as the greatest male figure skater of all time. No, I'm not talking about the most uptight skater to ever grace the ice, Brian Boitano. I have long had a deep dislike for that man that I simply cannot put into words. The man I'm talking about is none other than Mr. Scott "back flip efficiando" Hamilton.
When I was in about seventh or eighth grade I had to do a biography on a famous person. I chose Scott Hamilton. Say what you will, but Scott Hamilton has to be one of the most inspiring people, EVER. He was adopted, came down with a mysterious illness, was given six months to live, overcame the odds and went on to win an Olympic Gold medal in 1984. Now he still skates and commentates, eventhough in 1997 he was diagnosed with cancer. I cried like a baby my whole way through reading that book. Seriously. Scott Hamilton and Ryan White are the only two people who hold that honor. Take that, Bridges Of Madison County.
Then in 1992 I watched the Winter Olympics and rooted for great male skaters like Kurt "my brother is not Scott Hamilton" Browning, Paul "I'm a lawyer, I'm a skater, I'm a lawyer, I'm a skater" Wylie and Elvis "I can also make a legendary name seem cool" Stojko. I watched the women too, but for some reason I never grew quite as attached to that group.
My favorite skater of the 1992 Olympic games though had to be Christopher "The Showman" Bowman. Once a child actor, Christopher was a born entertainer and arguably the most naturally charismatic, dramatic and troubled figure skater of his time. Picture Robert Downey Jr. on ice and you had Chris. He never quite lived up to his potential though and now he's coaching in the sticks somewhere.
Not only was 1992 a great year for real ice skating, it was also a great year for fake ice skating. This was because it was the same year one of my favorite films of all time came out. That movie is The Cutting Edge.
Touted as the ultimate "Love/Skate Relationship", I was embarrasingly excited about the release of this movie long before it was released to theaters. The Cutting Edge had it all. It was a love story. It had sports. It had legendary actor, Terry O' Quinn. I mean really, what more could a girl ask for?
Imagine my surprise when I found out recently that they actually made The Cutting Edge 2. Apparently this time around it's the story of Doug Dorsey and Kate Moseley's daughter, which incidentally sounds like the exact same story only with a much smaller "cold shoulder". I mean I haven't seen it, but making The Cutting Edge without Moira Kelly or D.B. Sweeney? That's just like eating the icing without the cake.
Unfortunately, for all the glory, many Olympic athletes have a relatively short shelf life, literally, ending up on Wheaties boxes for a month or two, never to be heard from again. Others resurface on the sidelines as coaches, commentators or on shows like Skating With Celebrities. Some are even involved in a scandal or two. And they say ice skating is a boring sport.
Given my past love affair with ice skating, I entered the 2006 Winter Olympics season with the best of intentions. Not to be "toepicky", but soon after I found out Michelle Kwan was apparently "washed up" and forced into an early retirement at the age of 25, the rest of the lot somehow lost their luster.
I admire the hell out of ice skaters, even if I still can't tell the difference between a double axle and triple sow kow. But I'm afraid, for now, the days of the Ice Castles in the sky are but a frosty footed memory.
My whole life, sports and I have been like oil and water; we simply don't mix.
I throw like a girl. I have no strength. I'm not super competitive. Do I really need to keep going?
So it's not surprise that the feelings for the sports I play, carry over to the sports that I watch. In fact, I have only watched one sport with regularity. That sport, dear Internets, is ice skating.
I've heard the words of the naysayers before and frankly, they can be cold as ice. No, not all ice skaters are gay and yes, ice skating IS a real sport. Just because they get to wear pretty costumes and dance to fun music does not mean it's any easier than tackling or hitting a homerun. In fact, I'm going to go out on a limb here and say ice skating can skate circles around those other sports any day.
My love affair with the ice first came about when I discovered the man who will no doubt go do down as the greatest male figure skater of all time. No, I'm not talking about the most uptight skater to ever grace the ice, Brian Boitano. I have long had a deep dislike for that man that I simply cannot put into words. The man I'm talking about is none other than Mr. Scott "back flip efficiando" Hamilton.
When I was in about seventh or eighth grade I had to do a biography on a famous person. I chose Scott Hamilton. Say what you will, but Scott Hamilton has to be one of the most inspiring people, EVER. He was adopted, came down with a mysterious illness, was given six months to live, overcame the odds and went on to win an Olympic Gold medal in 1984. Now he still skates and commentates, eventhough in 1997 he was diagnosed with cancer. I cried like a baby my whole way through reading that book. Seriously. Scott Hamilton and Ryan White are the only two people who hold that honor. Take that, Bridges Of Madison County.
Then in 1992 I watched the Winter Olympics and rooted for great male skaters like Kurt "my brother is not Scott Hamilton" Browning, Paul "I'm a lawyer, I'm a skater, I'm a lawyer, I'm a skater" Wylie and Elvis "I can also make a legendary name seem cool" Stojko. I watched the women too, but for some reason I never grew quite as attached to that group.
My favorite skater of the 1992 Olympic games though had to be Christopher "The Showman" Bowman. Once a child actor, Christopher was a born entertainer and arguably the most naturally charismatic, dramatic and troubled figure skater of his time. Picture Robert Downey Jr. on ice and you had Chris. He never quite lived up to his potential though and now he's coaching in the sticks somewhere.
Not only was 1992 a great year for real ice skating, it was also a great year for fake ice skating. This was because it was the same year one of my favorite films of all time came out. That movie is The Cutting Edge.
Touted as the ultimate "Love/Skate Relationship", I was embarrasingly excited about the release of this movie long before it was released to theaters. The Cutting Edge had it all. It was a love story. It had sports. It had legendary actor, Terry O' Quinn. I mean really, what more could a girl ask for?
Imagine my surprise when I found out recently that they actually made The Cutting Edge 2. Apparently this time around it's the story of Doug Dorsey and Kate Moseley's daughter, which incidentally sounds like the exact same story only with a much smaller "cold shoulder". I mean I haven't seen it, but making The Cutting Edge without Moira Kelly or D.B. Sweeney? That's just like eating the icing without the cake.
Unfortunately, for all the glory, many Olympic athletes have a relatively short shelf life, literally, ending up on Wheaties boxes for a month or two, never to be heard from again. Others resurface on the sidelines as coaches, commentators or on shows like Skating With Celebrities. Some are even involved in a scandal or two. And they say ice skating is a boring sport.
Given my past love affair with ice skating, I entered the 2006 Winter Olympics season with the best of intentions. Not to be "toepicky", but soon after I found out Michelle Kwan was apparently "washed up" and forced into an early retirement at the age of 25, the rest of the lot somehow lost their luster.
I admire the hell out of ice skaters, even if I still can't tell the difference between a double axle and triple sow kow. But I'm afraid, for now, the days of the Ice Castles in the sky are but a frosty footed memory.
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